BREAKING: The world's most popular search engine Faustus is a disgrace, its founder claims. And in a statement that will shake Silicon Valley he says, selling your soul is no longer okay - even in the world of tech.
"We used our search engine to look up Faustus," said the founder Dr. Faustus at today's press conference. "And frankly, we were horrified. We'd assumed it would give us entries for knowledge and truth and the free flow of information. But all it came up with was filtering and censorship and selling-out. It was distressing."
"This company has principles, so there was only one thing for it. We called in the image consultants. They said we were no longer hip, cool, trendy. And, as everyone knows, those are our core principles! Consider the jukeboxes."
"We also learned that these days people associate us rather more with advertising than learning and knowledge. They reckon we sold out. Can you believe it?"
Faustus said the company will also end its controversial dealings with Lucifer. "A nightmare from start to finish. Selling your soul? It should be a piece of cake in this day and age. What globalisation's all about, right? But no. In the end we decided, if the devil won't take us seriously and deliver easy money, then on principle, if nothing else, we won't hang about. It is for others now to decide whether they wish to burn in hell for all eternity... Which they will, unless they do what we've done."
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
You're just a bunch of rank amateurs guys. You need age if you want authority. Expect the Chinese to take a bunch of kids seriously?
ReplyDeleteChinese negotiate hard - At the outset, they put on the charm and give concessions. Then when they think they have good leverage they squeeze everything they can get from you.
ReplyDeleteGoogle said it would censor google.cn in accordance with Chinese laws. Now it says it won't and has effectively shut google.cn. But loads of google sites outside of the scope of China's mainland laws are not censored and can be accessed.
ReplyDeleteSO what will the Chinese do next?
Remember: The reason Google is pulling out of China is because of Chinese hacking, not censorship.
ReplyDeletePrinciples?
Would never have happened in my day
ReplyDeleteI won't have any of what Google's having
ReplyDeleteChina's economic growth hasn't changed the fact that most of China is still poor. The arrival of the internet raises Chinese expectations. The Chinese Gov is probably thinking this must be carefully managed. Scared of unrest
ReplyDeletePeople's republic innit?
ReplyDeleteIt won't be fools stepping in where angels fear to tread, that's for sure.
ReplyDelete