Wednesday 10 March 2010

Class War - Gordon and Hattie's key moments

Part One - Sloane Ranger, no danger. Gordon and Hattie smile as power and influence shift from the old elite (the aristocracy) to the 'new money' (bankers, property developers, party donors etc). Here are the key events:

- Gordon sits back as cheap credit and rising property prices fuel an overheating economy.

- When the market collapses, Gordon bails out millionaire bankers from the public purse. His sidekick Hattie rants incoherently about 'the court of public opinion' and 'judgement day for greedy bankers'.

- Gordon dilutes the savings of low to middle income earners through QE (quantitative easing).

- Gordon sits back whilst millionaire bankers profit from QE-based trades. Bonuses are huge, even though no real value has been generated.

- Newly enriched bankers can continue sending their kids to Eton, St Pauls, Harrow or any other school that will give them a major advantage in life.

- But Gordon really hates Eton - It symbolises class privilege and the Conservative leader, David, went there. His sidekick Hattie hates Eton - she went to St Paul's Girls School. Together they try to persuade the electorate that Eton is synonymous with Tory Party elitism.

- But... bankers love Gordon - he made them rich. Eton loves Gordon - Thanks to Gordon's largesse, it is business as usual at the top public schools.

- Everyone loves Hattie. She's so terribly earnest about her 'equalities agenda'. And that's really funny - because, by and large, it is self-deluding twaddle that'll never address the real problems facing the UK.

- Gordon and Hattie's 'class warfare' has a whiff of 'Bullingdon' about it.

- Gordon and Hattie's 'class warfare' was probably conjured up on 'the playing fields of Hogwarts'.