Tuesday, 26 January 2010

Sinking feeling

(Two men in a boat. One is controlling the outboard motor, the other is pumping water from the hull for all he's worth. They are in a race and trying to get to the finishing line.)

Mr Brown: Keep pumping, Mr Darling. We are still afloat, still above the watermark, I tell you
Mr Darling: I do not know how long I can keep on pumping, Mr Brown.
Mr Brown: So long as you keep on pumping out more water than is coming in through the hull, then we'll reach tha' finishing line safe and sound.
Mr Darling: But Mr Brown, do the rules of the race allow a wrecked craft to win?
Mr Brown: I tell you, Mr Darling. All that the rules state is that we stay afloat and cross the finishing line. And nothing else.
Mr Darling: And when we cross that line, must I then keep on pumping? For if I don't keep pumping, then the craft will surely sink. And how will the judges award the craft the prize?
Mr Brown: I see, ya have a point, Mr Darling. Well, perhaps you could keep pumping until the prize has been given.
Mr Darling: Yes, Mr. Brown?
Mr. Brown: And after that you can let the vessel sink and we'll buy a new one and give it the same name as the vessel that won.
Mr Darling: But that will surely dilute tha' prize money, Mr Brown?
Mr. Brown: Aye, that it will. But it can nay be helped. Let's just win the race and worry about that when tha' time comes.