Tuesday, 19 January 2010

Three Men on Class (The Sequel)

Fred the Shred: (Dressed in Armani suit) I look down on him (Indicates Gordon Brown) because I am upper-class.

Gordon Brown: (Marks and Spencer suit) I look up to him (Fred the Shred) because he is upper-class; but I look down on him (Taxpayer) because he is lower-class. I am middle-class

Taxpayer: (Dressed in football shirt) I know my place. I look up to them both. But I don't look up to him (Gordon Brown) as much as I look up to him (Fred the Shred), because he has loads of money.

Fred the Shred: I have loads of money, but I cannot legislate. So sometimes I look up (bends knees, looks up) to him (Gordon Brown).

Gordon Brown: I still look up to him (Fred the Shred) because although I can legislate, I am still totally out of my depth. But I am not as out of my depth as him (Taxpayer) so I still look down on him (Taxpayer).

Taxpayer: I know my place. I look up to them both; but while I am poor, I am honest, industrious and trustworthy. Had I the inclination, I could look down on them. But I don't.

Gordon Brown: We all know our place, but what do we get out of it?

Fred the Shred: I get a feeling of superiority over them.

Gordon Brown: I get a feeling of inferiority from him, (Fred the Shred), but a feeling of superiority over him (Taxpayer).

Taxpayer: I get a pain in the back of my neck.


  1. Sir Frederick Goodwin19 January 2010 at 11:24

    Isn't it about time that we stopped knocking bankers? They are hardworking men and women who just want to make wads of cash - just like the next guy.

  2. Yeah guys whats with this mistrust of bankers? In my day you knew where you were with a banker.

  3. Yes, surely everyone is allowed to make the occasional mistake and almost bring about the collapse of the world financial system, aren't they? Give these guys a break.

  4. I am green with envy for the way in which you guys fucked your financial system.

  5. Uncle Bernie Madoff19 January 2010 at 11:28

    Now that everything is better, does that mean that I am also off the hook?

  6. I also get a pain in my wallet