A report by an inequality panel has revealed that the gap between rich and poor has widened under Labour. The report called An Anatomy of Economic Inequality in the UK found that the household wealth of the top 10% of the population is over 100 times higher than the wealth of the poorest 10%.
Responding to the report the Prime Minister said that the findings were surprising in view of his support for the banking system over recent years. "By allowing bankers, among others, to make huge wads of cash this government has created a strong basis for sustainable 'trickle down'. As we all know, 'trickle-down' is the means by which the poor benefit from the increasing wealth of the rich. As the rich get richer the 'trickle-down' becomes more rapid and enriches the poor.
"Now, not only have I made the rich richer since Labour came to power, but in 2008 when it looked as though the rich would get poorer I gave money to the banks to ensure that the rich would stay rich. This meant that bonuses could be paid to the bankers and they could in turn pay taxes back into the public coffers and spend their money on goods and services that benefited the poor."
The Prime Minister continued, "It is indeed surprising that the trickle down has not yet worked, but this is the best evidence yet that this government needs a fourth term, in order to complete its work, and to ensure ultimately that more trickles down to the poor."
Finally the Prime Minister was asked, "Wouldn't it have been easier if you had given all that money directly to the poor?"
He replied, "We are not a charity."