Monday, 4 January 2010

Justice Secretary denies problem with full-body scanners

Jack Straw has denied that full-body scanners are a waste of time because they don't detect low-density materials. Security experts have suggested that the scanners will not detect materials such as straw or paper.

The Justice Secretary said, "This does not matter as the full-body scanners will not be used on men of straw such as myself or paper tigers such as The Prime Minister."

He added, "Anyway the introduction of the scanners is just one of Gordon's marketing gimmicks aimed to make him look tough, like a real tiger.... Grrrrr!"

7 comments:

  1. 'Tiger' Brown4 January 2010 at 10:39

    I am a real tiger.... G... Gr.... Grr... Wait a minute does this mean I have to smile?

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  2. No, Tiggers are full of bounce... unlike the Prime Minister

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  3. I am rather fond of papier mache myself

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  4. I hope they didnt put low dencity mattearills in my boobies, otherwise they'll be in for a shock

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  5. Can I just say how fucking dense the PM is? There is no chance of him evading detection.

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  6. Can I just add how happy I am too be compared to a paper tiger?
    When Chairman Mao (God Bless Him) said this, he was referring America.
    So that means that I am like a big powerful country.

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  7. Yeah, but Gordo', you are actually like big, and not velly powerful c***

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