Thursday 10 September 2009

Yes, more clusterfucks

The financial markets are reeling today after the statement made by Alan Greenspan that a financial crisis will "happen again". Traders, taxpayers and Radio Four listeners had been hoping that after last year's near meltdown everyone had learnt their lesson. But Greenspan stated quite unequivocally, "This is not the first, and it will surely not be the last clusterfuck that the Western economies experience."

Gordon Brown and Alistair Darling have worked tirelessly over the past year to ensure that last year's crisis is never ever repeated. Gordon Brown, in his brand new initiative to put an end to 'boom and bust' has even considered restricting the bankers' bonuses many have blamed for the excessive risk taking activities that sparked the crisis in the first place... Although he has of late disgarded this idea in view of the fact that it would of course put an undue and some might say unnecessary burden on relations with his 'paymasters' in the city.

Whatever the case might be, the people have agreed one thing: Noone ever wants to see a repeat of the near collapse of Western financial markets that was witnessed in 2008. So it is with great sorrow and unhappiness that people have digested the statement made by Greenspan yesterday. Whoever would have thought that greed and recklessness and the desire to feather ones own nest at the expense of others could occur ever, ever again? And who would ever imagine that politicians, in all their wisdom and their kindness and in all their ability to absorb and understand history could allow such dreadful events to be repeated?

Perhaps... it is time to think the unthinkable... Perhaps it is time to ask whether our great, our wondrous leaders really are the brilliant, the benevolent, the masterful beings that we have always, always held them to be.

9 comments:

  1. No we hold them to be a bunch of t**ssers

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  2. Sir Alan does make me laugh. He was boss thru at least three financial crises

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  3. What was the point of the statement? For a statement like that to make sense, people have to be regularly asking the opposite. I have heard no one suggesting that 2008 was the last time it happened. So why was he saying it?
    He has to be expiating his guilt. He was very much responsible for this whole meltdown, so now he is trying to tell us that he is a really good bloke who can wave his finger and say: Kids do not do what I have done.

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  4. Hank from that Bank10 September 2009 at 19:34

    Bring the next crisis on... I'll have sold all my bank shares by then anyway.

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  5. Gordon has actually put an end to boom and bust. He has put an end to boom and bust 'in our time'.

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  6. Yep, boom and bust is so last season

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  7. Last season is so last season. Didn't anyone tell you?

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  8. What is a clusterfuck if you dont mind me asking?
    Sounds like some S& M action to me

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  9. Clusterfuck - American term for major major fuck up

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